Simply put, evangelicalism ceased to be a genuine way for me to live out my faith. A faith that engaged the world with love first, was intellectually honest, sought solidarity with “the least of these,” and actively pursued a diverse community. For me (and many others I know) American Evangelicalism has lost its spiritual, social, and moral authority.
I’m the 36 year old man sitting in the theater who starts tearing up when the Lucasfilm logo and “A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away” appear on the screen.
If there is one thing that I know about creativity, is that it is about turning chaos into order. It’s putting poetry to the pain of addiction, pursuing solitude to quiet an inner rage, or helping a client organize fragmented ideas and forming a plan. There’s even a very old story that talks about the beginning of the world, and the dark and formless void that was brought to order by divine presence. Fatherhood is full of chaotic moments and we have the daly choice to engage and create.
My job is to be there to let her cry on my shoulder, without me saying anything at all, without judgement. I need to allow her to feel hurt and remind myself I can’t always fix it for her.
It’s still a mystery as to how any of this was brought on. I’m not sure if I’ll ever know and that’s a little frustrating – but I’m so grateful for those in my life who have supported me and my family through this process.